Adrian Peterson arrested.

I honestly think the secret to instilling discipline in to your children is to ALWAYS give them a sense of assurance that you really love them and ARE doing what is best for them. I know they can't understand that but they shouldn't ever feel as though you are going to harm them. ANY discipline in ANY walk of life should always be administered constructively. By that, I mean if your kid ever asks "why?" don't just say "because I said so!" What LESSON does that teach? I mean sure they are absolutely obligated to listen to you but it just seems more "power trippy" than an actual valuable lesson. Any time your child asks "why?" it is a teachable moment. That is my opinion anyway. A parent is also a counselor. We have to "train" our children. Also I think discipline has to be ABSOLUTELY CONSISTENTLY administered. If I tell my son that backtalking will get him a whipping then EVERY time he backtalks he must get the whipping. The other day I overheard Ben saying "Oh my God" and I very sternly told him that he is no allowed to say that and I don't even know where he heard that phrase. I suspect probably at daycare or maybe from his older cousins whose parents just say anything in front of them. So I told him he would get in trouble if he said that again. Then the next day I told his teacher at the daycare he goes to at my mother-in-law's church that if they heard him to punish him immediately. I feel that will make him see that consequences are consistent and maybe help instill discipline. I also know that you can raise your kids the best you know how and they STILL might take the wrong road. I just want to be able to hold my head up when my kids leave the nest and be able to say that while they were here I did the best I could to ready them for life.

 

Just because something has been done your whole life doesn't make it right. I grew up in an old school home too, where everything was earned not given. We don't use switches or belts up here because that will get someone sent to jail, but I was given the odd smack growing up. I'm not against being physical with your kids, but I am against whipping them so hard that you leave bruises, welts, cuts, etc. That's abuse, not discipline. Just because your parents did it doesn't make it right.

There was a time when it would have been acceptable to smack your wife to keep her in line. What about having a designated seating area on the bus for black people, is that okay just because it used to be the norm?

20 years ago I had two Siberian huskies. When they did something wrong or didn't listen, they would get a smack across the nose or the ass. Anytime I ever raised my voice, even if I wasn't talking to them, they would cowher. They were scared of me. At the time I believed it was because they recognized me as the leader and fear would = obedience. These days I have two German shepherds and I'm much more informed how to raise dogs. I have never and will never smack them. When I raise my voice, even if I tell yell at them, they don't cowher in fear. My current dogs listen to me far better than my huskies ever did. Looking back, my huskies were scared of me, which is a very different thing than respecting someone as an authority figure. My current dogs listen to my every command, but they aren't scared of me in the least. They listen because they want to please me. I've taught them through training that listening to me results in a reward. Years later the reward doesn't need to be there anymore, they still love to please me.

Kids really aren't that different, especially when they're young. Go ahead, whip them if you want, but you're not doing anything but instilling fear, not respect. You don't teach anything by whipping your child, except to teach them that daddy is big and scary.

You may think what AP did is fine, but times have changed. Beating a helpless child to the point he's cut and bleeding is never okay.

 

I've not heard a single person on here arguing that what "AP" did was right. It has all been to the contrary. Most have just argued in favor of corporal punishment within reason from a general perspective. I ABSOLUTELY agree with you that what he did was wrong. Also it is hard to compare American society to Canadian society. We are a society founded on self reliance and individual liberty and Canada is much more state controlled. However, under our 10th amendment, states have the right to make their own laws as long as they don't violate the Constitution. So, for example, Vermont is much more a "nanny state" like Canada is (VT even has an actual socialist Senator in Washington) whereas TX or TN have far less gvt control and put more power in to the hands of the people. The people of Vermont are fine with their laws and the people of TX and TN are fine with their laws. But Canada is much more of a sort of blanket society isn't it? I'm asking if there are local laws in Canada or if all the laws are handed down from what is basically the equivalent of your federal gvt and blankets the whole country? So just because something is legal in TX doesn't mean it is legal in VT. Or just because something carries one penalty in TX doesn't mean it carries the same penalty in VT. But in Canada is there basically the same rules for the guy that lives at the northern tip as there is for the guy at the southern tip of the country?

 

I agree with all of what you said. I was just saying that because he said in Canada you would go to jail for whipping with a belt and I was saying that in America it is not just totally legal to do it because in some states you can and some states you can't. I was curious if it worked that way in Canada. I would say what AP did was ILLEGAL in ALL 50 STATES AND IT SHOULD BE. I also agree that things aren't right just because someone else did them. However the example given isn't a very good one because there has never been a time where it was legal for a man to hit a woman in any part of the country and that has always been viewed as legally wrong and morally wrong as well. At least by people I know. There is no justification to hurt another person through your own anger and negligence.

 

He has now turned himself in.
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/201...1-a-m-and-was-out-of-jail-half-an-hour-later/

 

No, she didn't listen the first time!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
IT"S JUST A JOKE, IT CAN'T HURT YOU!

 

Good one!

 

I gotta say, as someone who has worked with literally thousands of kids, I've seen good kids, bad kids, good parents, bad parents, kids who get beat up when they step out of line, and kids that are spoiled and have no boundaries at home. I also know good adults, friends of mine, who disagree about physically disciplining a child. Those that defend it point to their own upbringing. They feel like if they hadn't been beat up by a belt or a switch or a pair of hands or whatever, they wouldn't be the good person they are today.

Well, things could always be worse, but to me that line of thinking is just a well-intentioned lack of imagination. Plenty of people grow up without ever being so much as spanked, and were well-behaved children and are now well-behaved adults. I'm one. Perhaps your parents didn't know how to keep you in line without beating you. That doesn't mean it's impossible. It means they didn't know. They probably didn't know because they were raised the same way, just like you're still doing it to your kids because you don't know (or don't believe in) any other way.

Believe it or not, I also have a lot of professional experience with dogs, and shaner's post is dead on. It would surprise a lot of people how similar kids and dogs are. Any dog expert will tell you that you don't need to beat one to get it to behave. You can get them to behave by earning their respect as a leader. As a result, not only will you likely feel better about yourself and have a closer relationship with your dog, but you'll actually get better results from a behavioral standpoint, too.

Instilling fear can solve surface level problems, like making sure your kid comes home on time or your dog stays out of the kitchen. Earning respect will solve those problems, and it will keep your loved one healthy and happy, and not afraid of you. It also ensures they won't grow up warped because they were beaten as a kid. I understand you're beating them precisely so they grow up right, but you have to admit you're running the risk of them being permanently damaged emotionally.

AP is nowhere near Michael Vick or Ray Rice. Different universes. Adrian is being a bad parent, but he's doing so by trying to be a good parent. And he's doing so in a way that isn't just common, it's tradition. So I'm not mad at him. I don't want to punish him. I want to educate him. Vick and Rice did what they did because they are *******s. They don't need an education, because as humans over the age of 7, they already knew the things they did are horribly wrong. So they just need to feel pain. I hope AP doesn't just feel frustrated by what's happening, and feel like America's taking away his rights. I hope he thinks about it and learns from it.

There's just no reason to do it anymore. I know people fear change, but people also complain about how things suck. This is something that needs to change. It needs to stop.

 

With respect to gun laws, you're dead on. Our gun laws are far stricter than yours, although other than that, you have no more individual freedom than we do. Our laws are very similar. In fact, I happen to think of the US as more of a police state than up here, although neither are true police states by any means. We're no more state controlled than you are, except for one thing, gun laws. We have more social safety nets for those who get sick, lose their jobs, don't make much money, etc. but that's not really related to control.

All criminal laws are federal and are the same nation wide. We also have provincial laws as well as municipal by-laws.

Don't really understand the relevance of any of this though. There's no charge up here of whipping a child with a belt and if done without leaving a mark, it probably wouldn't be a criminal offence up here. What AP did though was beyond excessive

 

Exactly! It accomplishes nothing except to instill fear. I'm sure some will think I'm a tree hugging Liberal, but I promise you I'm anything but, I just don't believe in violence towards those who are helpless. You have a problem with another grown man and want to settle your dispute with a good ol' fashioned fist fight, I'm all for that, but teach your children with your words, not your fists

 

I just thought when you said that people would go to jail that you meant it was against the law to do it period. How much stricter are your laws? Are guns classified differently? Like what we just call a rifle your gvt would call it an "assault weapon"? Also are there much stricter penalties for gun crimes?

 

I agree that wifebeating went on a lot more. I was just saying that I didn't think it was ever actually "legal" to do it. It is quite sad that ANYbody could EVER find it acceptable though. I also agree that we don't need the gvt to be our conscience as well. I've never saw those ads but would actually like to. That just SOUNDS funny. Do they have captions like "what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes? Nothing! You've already told her twice!" and then say "Smoke Marlboro's"? LOL. I love seeing old ads that are CLEARLY politically incorrect or sexist or whatever by today's standards. I've seen some HILARIOUS old PSA's on youtube but you probably wouldn't appreciate me posting them here! LOL!!!

 

Automatic weapons are illegal up here. Although to be honest, I don't understand why any sane person needs an automatic gun. Frankly, I'm glad automatic weapons are illegal up here. At least if someone shoots at me with a handgun, I have a chance of them missing. If they shoot at me with an AK47, I'm a dead man.

Most rifles are legal. Handguns depend on the size. The smaller handguns out there are illegal, although most typical handguns are legal.

Shotguns are basically all legal.

We don't have CCW laws up here though. Nobody can carry a concealed weapon up here, ever.

 

Yeah that is definitely much more stringent than our laws.

 

An AK isn't actually "automatic" though right? Aren't they SEMI-auto? Basically a 30-06 with a grip?

 

Didn't know that

 

I was raised in a old school household however with a twist. It was my mother who dolled out the discipline. I can remember my father laying hands on me once. A few slaps on my butt.My mother however used belts, mop & broom handles, wiffle ball bats and her engagement ring (a backhand to the chops). Did I deserve it? Only every time. I will admit I was a hand full growing up. Than I became a father. My two boys are now 23 & 21. When they were little did I lay hands on them? Yes I did. Slaps on the butt with a open hand or a half hearted slap to the back of the head. Did I ever take a belt or a mop or broom handle or a wiffle ball bat to them? No I did not. We evolve. We learn that what we did in the past is not always the best way to do it today. AP just because you were disciplined with the switch doesnt make it right today. How can RG suspend Rice indefinitely for hitting a woman who was hitting and spitting on him (I agree with RG on this point) and not suspend AP for hitting a defenseless child? APs gotta go. His actions were worse than Rice! They involved a defenseless child.